My final full day in Auckland didn’t turn out quite like I’d hoped it would…

The first of only two big items on my itinerary was to see a Kiwi (bird) at the Auckland Zoo. I guess what happened is that the third straight day of sunny weather brought out all the stupid people and their children, and they arrived en masse at the zoo just moments before me.

World’s largest salt lick? This short video of a tiger was ruined by an oblivious woman who saw it fit to park her fat ass directly in front of my lens. Thanks for that…

Despite signs everywhere asking people not to feed the animals someone thought it would be good for a larf to pour some milk into a crevice in the exotic bird aviary. Hope these poor guys can handle type 2 diabetes!

Because Kiwis are nocturnal the zoo has set up a special indoor habitat to view them. If you think it looks serene, consider that on my side of the netting was a never-ending parade of ugly, stupid urchins repeatedly stating the obvious: “It’s dark, mommy, it’s dark…”

Fortunately the zoo has also fitted a small camera to where the Kiwis nest. Of course if they were really clever they’d stream this on their website thus saving me the twenty-dollar admission and another twenty for the cab ride out there.

But there was another live Kiwi viewing at the Native Fauna Encounter, a daily scheduled event. Here’s the best footage of the bird I could get. It begins and ends rather abruptly because my camera only records video in 30-second increments.

Okay, so here’s video proof that it’s not just me. The trainer had explicitly stated that the animals he was about to reveal were very skittish, and asked for quiet on their behalf. Watch him lose his cool as a trio of little shitbags in the back refuse to sit down and shut the fuck up as asked.

Not 10 seconds after this recording ended the poor frazzled bird ran in terror to the safety of another trainer behind the scenes. And just like that the encounter was over. Awesome.

This was the second big item on my itinerary for the day, a tour of Auckland’s Harbour by boat. Unfortunately the cab stand outside the zoo had somehow disappeared by the time I was ready to leave, so I had to walk out to the highway and catch a bus. And despite way too many stops the driver flew back into the downtown core, but I still managed to miss the last boat of the day by about 3 minutes.

So I drowned my sorrows in a local indulgence and headed back to my hotel in defeat…

Tomorrow it’s on to Wellington, where I may not be posting as regularly due to friends I’ll be visiting with there. I’ll do my best…