As of noon today I am officially on hiatus from any and all auditions for television commercials… And I couldn’t be happier!
The straw that broke this camel’s back was a cattle call for The Bay’s new Christmas spot, featuring a gaggle of horny Santas fondling women’s underwear — I swear I’m not making this up!
It wasn’t that I was kept waiting for almost an hour before going in for my big chance, or that I got a parking ticket because of it, or even the fact once I was in front of the camera I was required to don a full Santa suit, complete with sweaty beard worn by untold numbers of actors before me… No, it was the auditioners’ complete disregard for any dignity thought to have been possessed by the talent in that room, which I guess couldn’t have been much or we wouldn’t have been there in the first place.
And so I say “Uncle”. I’ve had it with commercials… Unless I can direct ’em, anyway.