The following are actual quotes from a letter to the editor in the Wheels section of today’s Toronto Star. Since The Star is firmly ensconced in the 20th-century internet—that is, no user interaction on their site—I’ll reply to the letter here. Tim Tomecko, I hope you find and read this!
I am sick and tired of hearing from people concerning the high cost of fuel who say things like “I have no sympathy for complaining SUV drivers.” Well, I drive an SUV and I never complain about the cost of fuel. I never have in my life. I knew what I was getting into when I bought my SUV and was prepared to deal with it.
And why should the rest of humanity have to “deal with” all the unnecessary pollution that spews from your tailpipe? Why do think summers in this city have become so unbearably hot? What do you really think is behind the devastating hurricanes in the United States, or the polar ice caps melting?
I’ll tell you: It’s you and your SUV.
When I watch the news, it’s the single mothers with three kids driving a van who they always show complaining.
That’s because minivans actually serve a practical purpose—hauling around kids. Have you ever taken your SUV off-road, or are you worried that all those bumps will knock your Super-Big Gulp into your lap?
I have yet to see an SUV driver on camera complaining. I did see a Hummer driver telling the reporter that he pays $80 three times a week to fill up. He didn’t look like he was going hungry, either.
But he is going without sex, because as everyone knows, the only reason men buy Hummers is to draw attention away from their small dicks.
I refuse to take what passes off as public transportation in Toronto … crammed into slow, smelly, overcrowded TTC vehicles full of the great unwashed masses who think garlic is a food group or who yell at the top of their lungs in a non-stop babble into a cellphone. No thanks. I will sit in my SUV, alone, with my radio on, my own thoughts and quite comfortable, thank you very much.
Sitting in your SUV alone, huh? I wonder why? Maybe because you are an intolerant, racist bastard? Or do you just want to sing along with your Sharon, Lois & Bram CDs without anyone knowing?
And in the winter after a snow storm, I will weave through traffic in four-wheel drive while watching the look of terror on the faces of the people in their “responsible” cars while they slide down the roadways backwards on an icy hill.
And I will be a safe distance behind you, phoning in your license plate to the police so they can arrest you for reckless driving. I’ve seen just as many winter accidents involving SUVs as cars, maybe more. Fact is, if you can’t slow down and take extra care in bad weather you shouldn’t be on the road at all. Jerk.